“Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom.” - Viktor E. Frankl
The past three years have been quite the rollercoaster for many people. Not only have there been several big hits in the world overall, but there have also been several big hits in many people's individual worlds. When I talk to people, many have this looming sense of negativity in the background that seems to creep into all they do, and the impact has been detrimental. When we have our own personal struggles that we are dealing with, they are hard enough. When the world events start to impact our individual struggles, it can feel so overwhelming that it can alter our thinking and create this idea that nothing will ever go right. It can be easy to start to tell yourself that you are destined to be stuck in a rut forever. The burning question then is: How do I get out of this cycle? The answer: By creating space.
Creating space is NOT an easy thing to do. When we start to spiral, we are creeping into fight/flight territory in our brains. This makes it difficult to respond and we tend to react instead. Creating space is when you have the awareness that you are starting to react and you take a step back from the situation to do whatever it is you need to do in order to take a break and take care of yourself. You are "creating space" between you and the issue that is making you react. This is extremely hard to do; however, with practice, it can make you feel better. Often times when you look back at how you reacted, it doesn't always feel good because it isn't often in alignment with your values and who you want to be as a person. It takes a lot of impulse control to be able to stop and think before you act. It's also rewarding to look at how you responded and feel proud of how you handled the situation.
Creating space can look like....
Walking away for a moment
Taking a sip of water
Closing your eyes and remembering a moment that made you smile
A phrase you repeat to yourself
All of these force you to pause. When you pause, you cannot react. If you are having trouble finding a way to pause, and none of these feel like they fit for you, please don't hesitate to reach out and schedule an appointment. I'd be happy to help you find a way to create space in your life.